Month: July 2018

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Some improvements

People, after 6 weeks on the road, we have some improvements to propose in the way things work. We need to make business cases, issue RFPs and get to work. Soon.

1. Toilets that empty themselves, as Martijn suggested earlier. Come on, we can go to Mars nowadays, something should be possible from a technology/ automation perspective. We are open to solutions with reasonable prices.

2. Hammocks that move themselves. We all now how extremely annoying it is when this moment comes that the hammock stops moving and you still haven’t fallen asleep. Unacceptable. We need a solution soon. Something like the mechanism that rotates the lamb in the Greek Easter, adapted for hammocks. Just saying. All proposals accepted.

3. (This is very innovative and needs society mindset change): We need silencers for kids. The kids can still scream, if they want, they will just wear this special thing in their mouth so that the noise level decreases. It is impossible otherwise.

(Citing an average dialogue with Gioia, occurs some million times a day:
Gioia: says something very loud
Sissy/Martijn: ‘Less loud moppie, we are not alone’
Gioia: continues in the same volume
Sissy/Martijn: ‘Shhhh, less loud, we need to respect our neighbours.’
Gioia: ‘Why?’
Sissy/Martijn: f*ck, there we go with the ‘why’ story again.
Gioia: goes on in high decibels, nothing changes
Sissy/Martijn: (with sweet voice, though starting getting nervous): Gioia, I am next to you, you don’t need to scream
Gioia: notices some irritation from dad and mom, but continues making het point very loudly.
The next scene has Martijn and Sissy banging their head on whatever surface is available.)

Healthy people come from healthy families, and you can’t have a healthy family without sane parents. All proposals accepted.

4. We need a smart vacuum cleaner for the campers and the area outside. Something that can be smart enough to know if it is dust, or sand, or food or liquid, that can lift the ladders and the bags on the floor when cleaning and can make a nice ‘beeep’ when done, so you know you can enter your clean camper again. When working outside, the supercleaner needs to evaluate the wind situation and work accordingly. Meaning: if the wind insists on blowing in the same direction with the same power, either do nothing and try again later (no point in cleaning), or keep cleaning and recleaning like a maniac, as per a certain user setting.

5. We have many trees growing in very unhandy for the camper positions. We need a way out – literally. We propose horizontal and vertical saws, placed on the top and sides of the camper that cut what whatever is on the way. We imagine weid landscapes where a square shape is left behind between trees, but we believe people will get used to it and might even like it eventually. High priority.

6. Washing up. We have no clue how to solve this, all options are good options. We are open to suggestions.

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Why leave?

I will not do any mentioning to the wildfires in Greece. The topic makes me having goose bumps and I try not to think about it.

This vacation is getting to the next level of comfort (and laziness, the two often go together). The kids are 100% used to campering and they are so happy, and in many ways self-entertained, that we can have moments of conventional ‘rest’ during the day. Martijn and I work like in a factory, picking up tasks with eye contact only and performing them over and over again (three times a day washing up, unlimited times cleaning and then tidying the chaos etc). Martijn remains the sanitary person – I will be for ever grateful – and I do laundry (superannoying, but way less disgusting).

Since we left camping Melissa, we came to camping Dias, closeby Gytheio, in the south. We know the area pretty well (Arna is not far) and have been in the camping next door a couple of times in the past. Armand, Alf we wave to you both from the other side of Taygetos! The landscape is more wild, the campings have this ‘semi-abanonded, semi-organized’ style and gather, as a result, more free-stylers. We missed the bright green fences of shiny campings when we first came, but now have become one with our environment and we truly love it.

We came here to meet Manos, Myrto, Sofia, Kostas and the kids, who stay in small apartments closeby the camping.

We are not very synchronized, but meet and share the kids ‘jump up, jump up and get down’ craziness, which multiplies infinitely when they are all together. The parents eat great food together, exchanging stories and experiences when no kid has pied/wants to sleep/wants to eat/jumps up like in an electroshock or is missing. You know what I mean. Yesterday we celebrated Dimitra’s first birthday by the camper with BBQ and birthday cake and all. It was supernice and I think the love affair Dimitra – Alex (signs already visible in the selfie above) started getting a bit too obvious. Alex, she is older. Dimitra, hands off.

(Alex grabs the phone and types ‘hgdxghjj’ every 2 minutes, so I suspect this post will take very long to finish).

We were supposed to stay here for 2-3 days max, but we are already six nights and neither Martijn nor me show any sign of wanting-to-leave. I mean, why leave.

1. The camper is next to the sea. We don’t even need to take our stuff to go swim, just walk, jump and come back. Priceless. Why leave?
2. We have dinner with the moon falling over the sea opposite to us. Why leave?
3. We are with friends, who have kids, with whom we have shared tons of experiences together – someone asked yesterday if Myrto and I are sisters. Why leave?
4. We have the best neighboors on the planet. The 60-year old Germans that speak only German to us, but are so cute. The ones with the VW van of the 70s, a Swiss that speaks Greek with a Brazilian that has a permanent smile, who live in Vienna and also have a 4-year old daughter. What a gift, Gioia is in heaven. Why leave?
5. (I kept it for the end). What an amazing sea again. Wide beach, transparent water, thick sand and the day of crazy winds and rain close to us, with Thailand like landscape. You should be crazy to want to leave.

We started discussing with Martijn what is the minimum number of days we need to leave here to make it to Igoumenitsa for picking the boat.

The sad thing is: 3 weeks left. I know for many of you 3 weeks of remaining holidays sounds like a complete luxury, but for us it is still sad. We will miss everything too much :(.

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Slow motion

We entered the sea hybernation mode, where you become one with the sand, and start cutting sentences in half because it costs too much effort to talk. You know, when your heart beats just enough to keep you going, and the biggest dilemma of the day is beer or wine (or ouzo). This mode.

I will never forget Martijn’s first holiday with my Greek friends, in Irakleia (I know non Greeks never heard of this island). In legendary Irakleia we spent a week, I think, under a tree. This.

[Background for people not familiar with the Dutch way of being: A Dutch that respects himself needs to be active. Very. Active. Sit and chill makes you feel guilty. You need to be busy, efficient and do all types of sports. You cycle to all directions and elevations with all weather conditions, preferrably with the wind against you to prove your Dutchness. And then you do trekking and some climbing for digestion, because you didn’t sweat enough. You get the point.]

So Martijn survived tropical temperatures and because he is not blond and when lying under a tree you can’t see his very Dutch height, people started talking to him in Greek. Ha. Ha. He didn’t have a nervous breakdown and we didn’t break up after this. Relationship crash test: CHECK!

Back to the present: When we arrived at Patras, after a night with me and Alex having become one on the narrowest bed I have ever seen, we had to reboot. As in: throw away all the dairy products (10 minutes was not enough to also empty the fridge), fill the tank and put some order in the hurricane chaos of the cabin. And we drove to Lehaina, to meet my mom!

Introducing Lehaina and ’the farm’ house there needs a whole different chapter, which I won’t write now, but let’s say few people had the chance to spend their summer the way my sister, my cousins and I did. The thing is that we didn’t know whether the camper could make the curve over the bridge to the house. It did! Ole!

We greeted aunt Gianna and the dogs, saw the house, loaded fruits and olive oil to the camper and left to the next camping. My mom had booked a room next to us, so we would spend the next 5 days together at the sea. The camping was truly amazing, large spaces, shadows, sea in front of us and contrary to all norms Dutch-free (full of Germans, though).

Very nice to introduce the campering experience to my mom. At the end of the holiday together, my 63-year old mom, who has not been fond of camping, said: she liked camping and she can even see herself doing this WITH A TENT! Is this not a huge success???

And the sea…man..the sea. Do take notes: Camping Melissa, Kastro Killinis. Looks like this:

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Imagine

Written by Martijn
Sanitary Senior Manager of the trip

Imagine you own a camper
Its easy if you try
No space above you
Around you only ply
Imagine all the people
Living just the same

Image there’s this toilet
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to make it flush well
Full in a day or two
Imagine all the people
Living life and pee

You may say I am a dreamer
But I am not the only one
I hope someday these toilets
Will empty themselves or be gone

Imagine no protection
I wonder if you can
No need for gloves or glasses
A complete relief for man
Imagine all the people
Not carrying around their turds

You may say I am a dreamer
But I am not the only one
I hope someday these toilets
Will empty themselves or be gone

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But…are you enjoying?

Martijn said I should also start writing about the nice stuff of the trip, else it might seem we don’t enjoy. I replied with confidence that people have a brain and can understand the humor. Or not? You know better.

The thing is that I don’t like it when people always choose to highlight the best, shiniest, happiest and most amazing of everything. Too much glitter for my taste, bliah. And I also believe these American inspired descriptions of ‘holidays’ and ‘new houses’ and ‘motherhood experiences’ are not even half true. Like everything needs to be always good, we are supposed to feel blessed day and night for all we have and not complain ever about anything. Hmmm.

Martijn is sometimes so positive about things that it gets hilarious. I think it’s an amazing skill to always be so happy and relaxed, don’t get me wrong, I just don’t have this gift. Martijn found the beer ‘very tasty’ in a wedding that was terrible and we were both saying how much we want to go home. Once in Amsterdam I asked: ‘What is the weather like outside?’ Answer: ‘Blue sky’. Pause, I thought ‘sounds good’. Martijn continues: ‘… between the clouds’. Jeeez!

So, we are enjoying very much. We are not in a nirvana state day and night, let alone with perfect Instagram hair and amazing photos. We enjoy more like normal average people, that almost missed a very expensive boat ride, let windows fly away from the camper and left home forgetting all lonely planet guidebooks. Well (reading the last sentence again), probably we are slightly worse than normal average people.

Here comes the list with the top amazing things of this trip:

1. The camper experience. It is truly fantastic. If you like camping with a tent, you will find yourself upgraded to a new comfort level. You miss nothing and yet you are in nature, in contact with people, you can hear the sea waves (like I do now) and leave whenever you want to the next destination.
2. The intensity of us 4 being all day together. No creche, no one to babysit, no job distraction. We are 100% together. I cannot think of any other circumstances this could happen.
3. The unknown. We have no idea where we go next and despite few minor disapointments, this gives you the feeling of unlimited freedom and flexibility.
4. The places we visit. Don’t forget we have two small kids, so our options are anyway limited. But given this limitation we have seen quite some incredible places. And campings. And every time you think you saw the best of this trip, a new ‘best’ is around the corner.
5. Being outdoors so much. You are in some way ‘indoors’, but very few milimeters separate you from the outside world. And you need to ‘go out’ for most activities. With the result that you are 80% outdoors, exposed to heat, wind, bad and good smells, sounds from the nature.

PS: Eva asked me if we have managed to take some rest. I think ‘rest’ is not exactly the right description of this trip, at least not in the conventional sense of the word. We are intensely busy with the kids and every time we leave a place and arrive to a new one, a lot needs to happen. But we are much ‘fuller’ and ‘happier’ than a month ago and I feel that with the same amount of effort we take much more in return. Plus seeing Gioia and Alex so happy is truly unique.

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Next mythical fuckup

I have always said that a Greek that wants to respect himself needs to miss at least one flight in his life. And listen to his/her name being called from the airport speakers a couple of times. I score ok in both, proving my Greekness, all these back at the time. Now I grew up and I am serious and I have been Dutchified, so I do not do these stuff. And I am together with a Dutch, what could possibly go wrong. *BIG LAUGHTER on the background.*

So…we were happy we left the last camping, where our spot was getting sauna tempratures. And the sea in the front was of course, guess what, not suitable for swimming. A real surprise, indeed. And full of hope we headed to Lecce, to spend few hours before taking the ferry to Greece from Brindisi. So we thought.

Funny that this has been the only thing planned for the entire trip: the tickets to Greece and back. Just to prove we totally s*ck with preparation.

Anyway, we were happy with incredible Lecce (Gioia had some typical local ice cream and forgot she walked 2,5 hrs in the sun with 35 degrees), and we were back in the camper.

We had parked just outside the centro storico, easy peasy, because we are experienced travellers and we rock. And according to our very accurate estimations we would be in Brindisi 2,5 hrs before the boat leaves, so we could take it supereasy and prepare ourselves in slow motion (empty the fridge, take clothes for the boat) and wave to Italy like in a post card.

Martijn checks the address of the ticket pickup point in Brindisi to type it in the navigation system (regular routine before we leave). And I am in the back, taking care of Alex. And then this soft voice comes from the driver seat:
Martijn: Sissy, we do not depart from Brindisi.
Sissy (heart stop): wtf?
Martijn: we leave from Bari.

The next scene is from a movie. Sissy almost throws Alex in his car seat from a distance, says: Gioia, you need to listen to us now and do not f*ck around (Gioia’s default attitude), ties Gioia in her car seat and at the same time tells Martijn: ‘tell me we can still make it. We can, right?’ Martijn ticks ticks ticks in the gps, the seconds are like centuries and within half a minute the engine is on, everything in the cabin secure to not fly and with the exact address not yet in the gps (it could not find it of course, Murphy’s law) we start driving. And I look at the printed ticket confirmation that was forgotten in a cupboard since we left Amsterdam: Bari – Patras. Loud and clear.

F*ck, f*ck, f*ck.

Long story short we made it on time. I thing I lost one of my fingers in the process, biting it, removing side skin and all – I had to release the tension somewhere. And Martijn let his greek side emerge (well, it is not that hard, he is anyway not completely Dutch) and started overtaking the crazy Italians. What do you mean by ‘campers of 8,5 meters length and 3,20 m height do not take the left lane? And go slowly behind trucks?’ Ha-ha-ha.

We had 10 full minutes to prepare for 4 people sleeping in a different place (cabin in the boat) after a month in the camper. Me in a speedy Gonzalez mode, Martijn (knows after 10 years), not talking at all to me, calmly doing all physical demanding work of carrying and rearranging and carrying 9kg Alex. I was literally throwing toothbrushes to a bag from a distance (they went in). Stress. Not sure how long it took me to calm down after we entered the boat.

We still don’t know what went wrong, we both remember wanting to book Brindisi. Probably Martijn saw there was no boat that date? Some price difference? Sissy (IT consultant): a wrong click in the dropdown menu? Bari and Brindisi both start with ‘B’, easy to mix up. No one will ever know. But one thing is for sure: no one of us ever checked the printouts. Sigh. So are we, people full of pitfalls.

(Laughing with the previous post): Bella Grecia, here we come. From Bari though. Pfiew…

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Getting closer!

Bella Grecia we are getting closer! I wave to my mom and beloved friends on the opposite side, we’ll see you very soon! We just crossed Brindisi, going even more to the south. In two days we’ll be back here for taking the boat.